Blessed Be The Arco Garbage God

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A Dumpsterdiver’s Hymnal

Once again
the Arco garbage god,
a deity well fed
by my gas station employer
(through me, chief trash dumper)
has favored me with a gift.

A few weeks ago
it was the opportunity
to return a trash-hidden purse
to a struggling mother
who had no idea
how the purse
got into a trash can.

Before that
it was a video camera.
Then a nice spice rack.

Today,
the god of garbage
and all things dumpster
gave me
a brand new black solar-powered
water resistant
chronometer sports watch.

Looks good on me.
Keeps time.
Didn’t come with instructions, though.
Maybe I’ll find them
in the Arco trash tomorrow.

One of my friends tells me she has noticed
over the years
that I have telekinetic powers,
the power to manifest into reality
the serendipidousest objects
and peoples and events . . .
all manifestations of my whims.

What I have noticed
is that I seem to be a copper magnet.
Pennies follow me wherever I go.
Maybe I should focus
on silver or gold.

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